How are you coping with pain?

There are different responses to experiencing pain. Some people cope ok and some people struggle. Some people struggle a lot.

Nobody copes well with pain, though.
Nobody lives entirely without pain, either!

My own experiences with pain would probably be the largest factor which, across many years, brought me to work as I do. Currently, I can say that I don’t experience major pain very much. My lower back was pretty crabby earlier this week, but it’s rare that it’s that bad. It didn’t concern me, because it’s been ok for ages so I did some stuff and then the remainder faded away.
But I’ve had pain that concerned me.
Constant, seemingly inescapable pain, and I wanted it to stop.

I wanted to save up the money, to pay whatever specialist I needed to see, to surgically fix whatever was wrong in my back, cos it was wrong. Boy, was it wrong. I did not enjoy life with constant pain, and by that I don’t mean I just sat on the couch and doomed out about my pain…… well not constantly, anyway. Because I won’t lie, there were some points exactly like that, when I felt any answer to the pain was hopeless. I did enjoy things in life, for example the old dux courtyard with flatties and friends, and seeing gigs both there and just about every venue in town- there was lots of stuff that was fun, but I wished I could do things without the constant companionship of …………………pain.
It was this kind of constant buzz kill, just sapping enjoyment away, and not how you want to spend your 20s ideally!

While picking up one of said flatties on the way home from work every day, I would walk past this poster about Pilates, and how helpful it was with this list of problems, including lower back pain. I walked past it for months, and then decided that although my problem was just too serious for something like Pilates to fix it, I should give it a go because the poster said it might help and if it just sucks, I can just not go back.
I arrived at the first class, and I remember there were two other guys and me in a room of women. I wondered why women got so much more back pain than men, and thought that sucked and wasn’t fair. But, of course that wasn’t it at all, it’s just that women are far, far more likely to do something about their pain. In that first class, I learnt that I had been stretching all the wrong things (and not necessarily making it worse, but not really helping things much either, whoops!) and had zero core strength, and couldn’t breathe properly during the exercises, and it was all a complete revelation.
It was kinda crushing too, to know there was clearly a loooot of work to do, and I wondered how I’d come to be in this mess. After that first term, I decided I’d not go back til I could manage my breathing better, so I went away and thought about it constantly. Thought about my core and keeping it engaged, constantly. When I went back to Pilates, I was doing better at it- it still hurt doing some of the exercises, but less than before. I was coping better with pain in the rest of life too. My interest grew rapidly, very soon came a bunch of massage courses, then a chiro degree, and I’m still constantly learning.

I can honestly tell you that over the last 20 years, I’ve gained a pretty good understanding of what’s going on in my own body, and in my practice that knowledge is hugely informative in helping others.
I can also tell you from the size of my student loan, the cheaper option would have been to go see someone like me, and talk to them about what’s going on! Of course, not everybody wants, or needs, the depth of understanding involved in all my study to be able to live with less pain, it’s not necessary. That was just my need experientially, and I’m thankful I can communicate it with others, and that it’s helpful to them. No two problems have the exact same solution, as no two people are exactly the same, but there are lots of things that you can do yourself to feel improvement, and seeing people who practice bodywork, movement and exercise to address pain will arm you with tools to use which are appropriate for what’s going on.

So I do not want it to seem like a boast when I said before that I don’t experience much pain, but to hopefully help explain that it’s achievable, and also importantly that I had misconceptions about my pain and pain in general, as lots of people do- gaining a better understanding of your body is never a bad idea!
Is it possible to live pain free? No, pain is a natural part of everyone’s life, though it certainly can be excessive and detrimental to our enjoyment of life. Talking to someone who knows a bit about pain and how to manage it can be very helpful.